Letter #1

DEER kids,

MY but the time haz run away From all UV us. say george you ARE so lucky to have good old helleen cookin fir YOU all these yeers. here favritecooking is buttermilk soop with hotpups. Myrtle Beineke from Avres ave kame over last weak And waz talking about THE chuch shee went too she siad THat shee wass A memmber for 40 years and She never put money in THe collection PLATE . One time shee hurt here self opening a can ov oscar meyers SArdines. We wunder about nixon Alot. MY wife sat next to the tube for weaks hoping nixon would win. SHE says its trajic. THE old gal had here feet fixed in periaby MARGERETS foot man BOY she had bad feet looked like she waz wearing a filders base ball glove when shee was bearfoot.. NO webbing between the toes but black And thick with korns galore. LAST weak the old gal made french toast in the toaster.. blew 4 fuses. I realy laff at here and she gets mad. we laugh a lot . WE even laughed at elmers funeral . I8ii tell you wy and you will laugh. he was in thee casket his hands folded over his stomach and his one finger had A booger on it it looked likee one anyway. the old wify iz calling soo i half to go.

Letter #2

deer kids.

Well the cristmas season is over and boy are we glad. The good wife and me spent to much money on the kids but after all wh0 is most impordant the president or yur kids$. Its an old tratition at our place to have the kids over tp our place for the meal befor old st. Nicky comes down the chimminey. The old gal made smorzgabord, thats Norweegin fur all kinds of food, and A&P cofee with Daryrich. Nobody new that it waznt creem. We laughed at that cauz a lot of peeple think they now diffrent. well wat do you think i got for cristmus//?? A box that shakes my plates. honest.. when the old gal iznt lookin i pop out my teeth slip em in the blue water and swich them on. they giggle in thw water and all the crumbs come out from between theivorys. The old gal hates to see me witout my plates so i do it on the sly. Hellen, did you get a gift or two from good old geeorge//? he is a fine fella. Did he ever tell you when he and i went to the taveern one time??// It was hellarious but i cant tell you why cause youd blow yur kool.. a kid sayin. we stopped by a few weeks ago but youz was out agin. Boy you kids sure travel. all the gud wife and i do is eat but never like Hellen cooks. Her cow tail soop is best of all. tastes so gud you hate tp put it down. we herd that on th telly.the tails with ten bears musturd is teriffic. sure wish you kids cud of seen the folks from ridgeway st. remember lois & kenneth Markworth///?? they had an old Nash car like flossie & freddie uzed to have only theres waz sky blooish in color. well youll never guess that they are divorcing . Why//?? wall i8ll tell you if you dont say anything to ag & verrna. She left the luthern church and joined the episcapals with there high & mighty servizes. Kinda like catlics excert they don have no beeds. we laughed at that a lot. we laugh a lot at dum things and I hope you hellen and gud old george laufg too. it is fun.

my finger is tired so i8ll quit. give us a ring sooon.

Letter #3

Hello to my pals Helen und George,,,,,

Honest, we are on the go again, looking for good places to eat and sleep. Next time we go the good wife says Helen and George go with us. She is a fine cook and a real lady. A couple weeks ago we was at your place on Hamlin but you kids were gone as usual. The wife thought maybe Helen had some cold pork for a sadwich and buttermilk to wash it down. Todays buttermilk isnt what it used to be. We had butter pieces inour glass and it stuck to [our?] insides. The pices ran down the side and they looked like road maps with rivers and streets. My wife laughs at that. She enjoys plenty of things especially funny things. When Liberace was on the telly she loved him when he winked. She thinks he sees her but I know differt. On our last trip we stopped in Barraboo for old times. We looked for the cottages but they are torn down. Remember when we had a cottage next to you guys and we went swimming at night after dark. George got mad but I always swam after Helen and she liked it so much that my good wife said no more Barraboo for you. She was a gealous girl cause i always talk about your gravy and potato pancakes. Not togethwr I dont mean. The old gal is breathing harder these days. She is short of everything, breath, money and teeth. Had the last tooth pulled in August and now she eats mashed squash but no peanuts. Her legs are on a window sill today.. resting the purple veins.

We must say toodleooo for now as the motel manager asked us to pay or leave. We are on the move again and hope to visit with you, floss and Clara Meinke. Shes a good girl too.


Letter #4

Deer kids:

We waz gone fur ages to the paradize of the west, californa. Remember, our kids live there in Los angeles. Buddy is at an aircraft plant makin bolts and our daughter in law is at a restrant waitin on tables. sometimes movie stars eat there. Wilma Banke the old time star went there years ago so she didnt see her. we miss you kids but are back now so well visit soon. Hows good old Heleene? An George are you still readin those magazines . I had to laff at the old gal. when we waz in the West she wore cowboy boots. Her legs are crooked anyway but with boots on she looked awfull. She got mad when I laff at her. We laff a lot. She eats pretty good and has great elimination. cant complain about health. at night she dont sleep too gud. She dusts the house often and shakes rugs out the window. Last Satrday she leened out a window shakin a throw rug and out she went, landed on her head in a snow bank. she had on her cowboy boots an it took three men (they hid there eyes) to pull her out. Boy did I laff. Sha waz mad at me. Heleene,I miss yur meet balls with sweet sour gravvy. Boy can you cook. Its time for my nap so ill say goodby for now . Oh yah, guess who we saw out west. Carl and Mable Westphall. They lives neer Mozart school by the alley. its terrble there now. Maybe Friday we will drop in.

Letter #5

    Hello kids,

My oh my but time does fly. The good wife and me was just thinkin about 1941 when the Japs attak Pearl Harbur. Thats 34 years ago in December. We waz at Mildred and John Kretzners house that day. You remember them. She was the gal that had warts on her chin, 6 of them. George said once that the warts looked like pale raisens. She used to shave once in a while cause of the black hairs on the chin. Boy did we laff. We laff a lot but the old gal gets mad at me when I laff too much. We were on a short vacation last month. Had plenty to eat and plenty gas. a funny thing happened at a motel in Arkansaw. we checked in, unloaded the car and I took a bath. The old gal thot she like to soak so she filled the tub to the top. she called me in to wash her back.. I almost split my sides laffin. Her little head was stickin out of the water and it looked like a hairy grapefruit (shes almost bald) flotin between two hot water bottles. waz she mad. Say Gorge, hows good pal Heleene? We still wanta drop in for that good Germon potato salad thats warmish and pollock ham. We might be in your neghborhood next week. The old gal is going to a meetin at a Jehovah church, some kind of ladies meeting. it is on the 14th.Ill bring some beer cause i know Hellene drinks beer. I' ll never forget the time she waz potts and sittin on the pantry floor singing, "Ich Liebe Diche". Hey I gotta close as the old gal is callin me. Must be time to eat or take vitimin tablets.


Letter #6

(See Letter #1.)

Letter #7

Hello kids:

We just got back from Miami, we had a gud time but ate too much agin. The good wife was mizerable a few days with bloated stomach. She ate 2 ponds of peanuts in 2 days, drank a few bottles of beer and threw up in the closet. why in the closet? she was puttin on her panty hose while sittin on the bed, got one foot in, the other one got caught under an end table and she sling shotted herself into the closet. the shock of the fast trip upset her and she puked. did I laff. How are you kids? we went by your place last Saturday or Sunday I don't remember which day but you was'nt home. It was in the afternoon. Maybe you were at yur church or for a walk. Guess who we met in Miami? She was a nice gal in school and married young. Say, we are having a big party for our frends and want you kids to come too. It is on Nov. 16 at our place. the old girl will try to make GAwoomkees. I'm laffin already cause she's worryin about there looks.Don't know what she meens. She's a bit balmy these days. Last week she made French toast in the toaster.. blew 3 fuses. I really laff at her and she gets mad. Time to go now. Will we see you on the 16th. Call.